TATTOOS THAT TOTALLY SUCK ASS

Posted: July 21, 2010 in The Usual Stuff

Tattoos are popular.  Lots of people get them and for the most part they’re done with a lot of skill and artistic talent.  Then there’s these fucking sadsacks:

No, really, its Wolverine...

Believe it or not, an adult drew this.  It supposed to be Wolverine… which is fine… but considering there’s about 5 trillion images in existence that the artist could have used as reference… I gotta say SUCK ASS.

Wow, I’m kind of impressed.  Despite this being the simplest tattoo in history, the artist still managed to convey how horribly they fucking suck. So little can really say a lot.

I dont' care if your son drew it...it sucks

I don’t care if your son scrawled this for mother’s day… or if one of the kids down at the battered wives shelter drew it for you as a gift… IT’S PERMANENT!  This belongs on a fucking FRIDGE, not your arm.

King Shit, Terd Island

You’re in need of two things my friend…a good ass wax and a new tattoo shop.  T-Rex is considered the King of the Dinosaurs… but this literal interpretation complete with crudely drawn crown is leaving me feeling a bit… hmmm… ok, ya got me,  its not the tattoo that offends me, its the hairy ass.

This sucks on about 5 levels.  I’ve decided to imagine that that the artist was actually a really cool badass who purposely botched this weak looking tattoo just to scar the fool who was willing to get it in the first place.

3 things this tattoo will never create

Truth is, even if it was awesome from a graphic standpoint, the nauseating, trite sentiment would make this suck.  Love, Loyalty Friendship…3 things this crock of shit tattoo will never create.  In fact, if you got this tattoo I would stop loving you and we would never be friends.  In fact, the first chance I’d get I’d betray you… because you suck at choosing tattoos and I can’t get behind a person like that.

God, and anyone with a grade 3 education

Only God will ‘juge’ you?  I don’t fucking think so Shecky.  Try anyone who graduated Grade 6.   This pic sorta looks photoshopped but I sure hope its real.  I hope this was the picture he took to the Tattoo guy and said “this is what I’ve designed” and the Tattoo guy just smiled and went “sure, I can do that”.

Worst cat face in history!

If your intention was to make it look like a 5 year old drew “a scary cat face”… in pencil crayon… in the dark… you’ve succeeded.  If that was not the intention you need to think about litigation.  I’m assuming it was supposed to look ferocious?!  I’ve seen scarier pictures of Fozzy The Bear:

Scary shit, yo!

AND FINALLY:

Ugly has a new definition!

You can’t be fucking serious.  If I was a tattoo artist, and mutilated someone with this abomination I would pack up my shit and go home.  This poor individual now has to carry around a PHOTO of their child just to convince people the tattoo isn’t Golem from Lord Of The Rings.  Personally, I think we’re being a little unfair to Golem… the pigtail would be beneath him.


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Comments
  1. Dee - Sister of Daryl says:

    The fozzie bear comparison did me in… this post is some funny shit!

  2. Tanya says:

    Oh man, those are some seriously sad tattoo’s. I am DYING! LMAO!

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